It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
