I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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