idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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