Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
