Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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