After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
