I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize