She announced her abortion via fbk
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
