Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
