All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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