She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize