well I can't set my house on fire every night
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
