you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
