ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Randomize
