Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
