i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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