so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
