This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
