Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
