i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
