The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
