this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize