k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
