I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
You did what with his pubic hair?
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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