Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
where are you?
Hypothermia
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
