is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize