you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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