did you get engaged???
butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Still dying that you shit outside
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
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