I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Randomize
