so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
