Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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