ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
foreskin is a definite game changer
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Randomize
