Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
