: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
