Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
