Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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