Little spoons don't ask big questions
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
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