Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
it was like eating out sand paper
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Floor bacon is actually really good
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Randomize
