you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
where are you?
Hypothermia
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize
