What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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