Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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