I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize