just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
