Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
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