Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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