Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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