I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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