Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Randomize
