Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Randomize
