I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
