No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize
