How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Randomize
